The Reason We Can't Just "Let Go"
Your hearts secret protector that keeps you hanging on even when you want to let go
When we experience traumatic events and we don’t have the tools or space to process those emotions, we push them down and they begin to live in the body. When energy is trapped in the body for long enough, it creates physical pain and eventually illness.
Your repressed anger and resentment lives in the liver, your unprocessed grief lives in the lungs and helplessness lives in the spleen.
When trauma overlaps with different organs, you cannot just let go especially if it involves the pericardium, the hearts protector. Each organ has to be addressed and the energy has to be released from each one. It’s like you’re trying to untangle a bunch of necklaces that you left in your jewelry box to free the one you want to wear. If the necklaces are all tangled together, there’s no way to free one necklace without freeing them all.
For as long as I can remember, I felt this deep shame and disgust towards myself that I didn’t understand. I searched and searched for the source through deep healing work but I would always come up empty handed.
It felt haunting, like there was a shadow of shame cast over every thought of myself. This caused me to settle for emotionally unavailable partners, neglect my heath and doubt that I deserved to be happy. I was settling in every area of my life.
I kept waiting for the next shoe to drop, expecting more suffering instead of happiness even though I worked so hard to change my life. My brain would say “Life is going good but, it’s a little too good. I don’t know if I deserve this much goodness.”
That’s when my grandma visited me during a healing ceremony. I lost my grandma when I was 15 and as a psychic medium, I wondered why she never came to see me over the last 20 years. My grandma was the victim of narcissistic abuse and she abused my mother too.
She passed her pain down to me through my mother and deep down, I was angry at her that she didn’t break the cycle when she had the chance. That’s when I realized, she couldn’t visit me because I was resisting her presence, resisting the emotions that I would have to feel when I connected with her again. I rejected her because I saw her as the source of my suffering. If she had never abused my mother, maybe I would have been loved and not so damn traumatized.
I felt an overwhelming pain in my chest that flowed down into the tendons in my arms and neck. My upper body tightened and froze, I thought I was having a heart attack. That’s when it happened, I saw what my grandma went through, how she was abused and abandoned, cast aside like she didn’t matter again and again.
My lower back started to cramp up and the shame, disgust and guilt I was carrying in my hips hit my heart like a wave I couldn’t outrun. I couldn’t let this go because I didn’t allow myself to. My own heart was protecting me from feeling what my grandmother went through.
I inherited that shame, self disgust and guilt but I also inherited a heart shield that was tight and closed, working as hard as it could to protect me from the pain that was living inside of me.
The pericardium is like your heart’s personal bodyguard. It’s a thin, protective sac made of tissue and fluid that wraps around your heart. Physically, it cushions the heart, keeps it in place, and prevents it from getting damaged or overworked.
Spiritually and energetically, it acts as an emotional gatekeeper deciding what feelings can get close to your heart and which ones it will block to protect you.
Here’s the kicker, if you’re on the path of healing and you’re struggling to release deep emotions you can’t find the source of, your pericardium is in protection mode. If you feel like somethings stuck inside of you but you just can’t let it out, it’s because once upon a time, it wasn’t safe for you to feel those things. Your survival depended on the pericardium to protect you from your own feelings.
And now that you’re ready to heal, the pericardium stays frozen until you address it, communicate with it and release the memories it’s holding. Think of it like a guard dog you’ve trained to ferociously protect you from your emotions. You have to retain the guard dog.
The heart is the center of alchemy in the body. To release trapped somatic energy that’s related to your generational or personal trauma, your heart must be open, ready and willing to feel. Feeling releases the charge in the body and allows you transmute your suffering into wisdom but if the heart shield is in protection mode, you’ll have a blindspot just like I did.
Since working through the trauma living in my heart’s protector, I have done countless one on one sessions to help people release it from their body too. It's the most important organ to heal first before you try to work through any other trauma in the body.
I created a free ebook to help you learn more about the pericardium and how to connect with it!
